The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F**k

Lesson 1. Introduction. 

Mark Manson, in his best-selling book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F**k, gets done with the unrealistically positive expectations that most self-care books set for us. These books talk about being happier, healthier, more positive, richer, popular, admired, prettier and it goes on and on. There is no end to this list. On the other hand, this fixation with what we need to become, only serves to remind us over and over again, what we are not, resulting in our poor self-esteem. After all, if we were content and satisfied with who we are, we would not have been reading these books at all. 

The more desperately you want to be rich the more you feel poor and worthless irrespective of how much money you actually make and whether it is enough or not. Television commercials and Instagram only help to set unrealistic standards of happiness for us. It is designed to tell us that we need MORE – be MORE, care MORE, do MORE and have MORE. There is no end to desiring MORE of something. This results in poor mental health and self-esteem as we tend to get more and more attached to the superficial and the fake.

These ideals constantly ask us to care about the fake ideals of happiness and chase a false mirage of satisfaction. The more we pursue feeling better all the time, the worse we are bound to feel. This process not only reminds us of our shortcomings but also makes the persuasion an unending one – one where we can never stop to really enjoy what we have. What is more important is to focus on your priorities and stop caring about what doesn’t matter to you. Not caring does not essentially mean being indifferent. It means to be comfortable with who we are.

Lesson 2. Happiness is a Problem.

Happiness does not have a set standard and you must not let society set one for you. Stop living up to the standards of a good life set by society and social media. Realise that it is perfectly normal for you to be unhappy sometimes. Realise that ups and downs are parts of life. Suffering is an inevitable part of life because life cannot ever be perfect, no matter how hard you try. The goal is to turn your pain and trauma into your power and use them to better your life. 

We need to understand that there is no set formula to be happy. The idea that we need to work hard to achieve happiness, is flawed and