Hold Me Tight Book Cover

Hold Me Tight

Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love
Publishing Year: 2008
Reading time: Key takeways: Quotes:

What’s inside

Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love written by Dr. Sue Johnson was originally published in the year 2008. Emotionally Focused Therapy is presented by Dr. Sue Jonson in the book. In the Introduction of the book, she mentions how fascinated she has always been by relationships. She was emotionally devastated when her parent’s marriage fell apart. After which she followed her fascination with love and relationships into psychology and counseling. The book is divided into three parts. The first part of the book answers the age old question of what actually love is. The second part is the streamlined version of Emotionally Focused Therapy. And the third part addresses the power of love. The book designed in such a way that it can be used by every couple, straight or gay, young or old, married or engaged or cohabiting, happy or distressed, it is for all couple seeking a happily ever after in love.

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Lesson 1.  What is Love?

Most potent and most used word in the English language might be the word “love”. We write poems about it, we sing songs about it, we pray for it, we have fought wars for love and have built monuments for love. We jump out of joy when someone declares their love for us, we cry for the same. We think about it and talk about it incessantly.

But what is love?

Practitioners, scholars and researchers are putting a lot of efforts in comprehending the definition of love for centuries. To some distant, emotionally uninvolved observers the mutually beneficial alliance based on trading favors is love. Basically love is a give-get bargain. The history-inclined observers see it as a sentimental social custom, built by the minstrels from the thirteenth century France. It is seen as a strategy to make certain the transmission of genes regarding the offspring, by the anthropologists and the biologists. People are still searching for the definition of love as the subject remains mystical and indefinable. 

In the 1700s Benjamin Franklin, an intelligent student in so many fields could only answer love as “changeable, transient, accidental.” 

In the 21st century we no longer can define love as a mystic, indefinable emotion. As most of us are living in social isolation, a love relationship has become the central relationship of our lives. Most of us are living a life where we work longer and longer hours and commute farther and farther distances, and have very few opportunities to form the foundation of a close relationship.

Dr. Johnson states that most of the couples she met while practicing were living in a community of two. Evidently, people ask their partners for an emotional connection, attachment and a sense of belonging, which people in the 1800s could feel from a whole village.

The movies, soap operas, dramas project finding love as the sole purpose of a person’s  existence, this influences people to such an extent that they become obsessed with finding a romantic partner. People usually tend to put the idea of loving a person who will change their world ahead of a satisfying career and financial success.


Lesson 2. Attachment and Detachment.

Understanding the toxic patterns in a relationship has the potential to guide us to the moments that make and break a relationship.  We often do not understand what is actually happening around us and how to react when the dramatic exchange between lovers is evolving very fast.  But if we can slow things down, then we will be

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About the author

Dr. Sue Johnson Image

Dr. Sue Johnson, a psychologist and author, pioneered Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for couples, revolutionizing relationship therapy. Her work focuses on attachment theory, emphasizing emotional connection to heal and strengthen relationships. Through ...

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Chapter List
  • Lesson 1.  What is Love?
  • Lesson 2. Attachment and Detachment.
  • Lesson 3. How to Achieve Happily Ever After?
  • Lesson 4. Demon Dialogue.
  • Lesson 5. Vulnerability.
  • Lesson 6. Final Frontier.
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In the summary of Hold Me Tight book, there are 6 key lessons. These lessons include:

  1. Lesson 1.  What is Love?
  2. Lesson 2. Attachment and Detachment.
  3. Lesson 3. How to Achieve Happily Ever After?
  4. Lesson 4. Demon Dialogue.
  5. Lesson 5. Vulnerability.
  6. Lesson 6. Final Frontier.

Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson was published in 2008.

Once you've completed Hold Me Tight book, We suggest reading out The Millionaire Fastlane as a great follow-up read.

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In the printed version of Hold Me Tight book have over 300 pages and usually takes 8-10 days to finish. However, with the Wizdom app, including its summary and audiobook, it can be completed in just 15 minutes.

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